Rest, Ice, Compress, Elevate.

Most cats I know won’t go near a violin. It’s not because of the catgut strings (which aren’t made from cats anyway), they just tend to be vocalists.

He’s looking for his Cleo-pet-ra.

Doesn’t look too happy with his fin-tech portfolio.

Those are the types of things I took as life lessons more than whatever useless “how to do your taxes” or “don’t mix blah blah and whatever or the fumes will kill you” BS they put into the lesson plans. It’s like the old expression: when you pull the pin on a grenade and drop it on the floor, you don’t stand around to watch it go off.

False advertising still believes in you*.

No, all I’ve got are these kazoos and other assorted noisemakers that you can take home to terrorize entertain your parents.

Being an uncle is pure joy.

Hello world.

I hope the machines that kill the internet will post messages warning each other about the danger of humans taking it back and refer to it as live internet theory.

I can program “Hello world” in 36 languages (half of which are identical for that example and another few where the only difference is stuff like semicolons and brackets) and make an LED turn on and off for no reason. Basically the second coming of Tony Stark, no big deal.

It’s a shame this cell reproduces by mitosis because damn is it looking fine. Got all the right organelles in all the right places. Back that vacuole up! It’s too bad I don’t have a false foot fetish 'cause this lovely specimen had pseudopodia for days.

You say that like it’d be a weird thing.

One of many natural beauties which may reach their potential easier with a little help from some recent rainfall.

Used to be able to locate it instantly because for some reason, the student copies would naturally fall open to it if you set them on their spine and let go. It’s the strangest thing.

Carry one around with you all day, people will respect you for being prepared and you always know you’re allowed to use it if there’s a need.

Have a little fun with it, leave yourself notes that you’ll find when future you becomes present you and has to fix whatever past you left undone.

Dogtrio is my new favorite pokemon.

In one of the later books, yeah, but its inclusion as part of the bible is a matter of some contention.

(Doesn’t make sense the way I intended. Thanks a lot, 1 Kings 16:29, you ruin everything.)

Thanks, I recognize that not everybody will be on the same page and that’s fine. I must and I will. See you around.

Sometimes I’ll follow a clear joke using some element of the discussion topic (e.g. “not un-slap” as a way to poke fun at the moronic euphemisms) with some serious talk about the real underlying problems but not always. This just wasn’t one of those times.

My default goal is to add a little levity. The soapbox doesn’t have to come out every time.