‘Try not to suck any dick on your way through the parking lot!’

Exactly this. When he was 'broke ’ he was just a kid and couldn’t by a Lambo because he was bored. Now he has an amount of money that requires responsibility, so much so that professionals are required to handle it. Sooo stressful.

He doesn’t know what Broke is. Honestly, most people that say they are don’t.

I doubt he’s ever had to pass on brunch so he wouldn’t have to worry about his check to the gas company bouncing.

Never had to pawn his stereo to cover rent so his girlfriend wouldn’t finally kick him out.

Never had to calculate whether the bus fare to and from the plasma clinic was actually worth the trip for a donation.

I’m tempted to spin up a website that is just a four year progress bar, but that’s too doomy, even for me.

Thought that was an actual Scandinavian word for a moment…

I think all of us have Friends in Low Places.

Kind of like a business having a Web Presence and when you Google them it’s a link to their Instagram. Garbage.

Aw. It’s just a liddle guy…

It was a yellow onion, but one of those fancy white ones you have nowadays.

: onion: 🧅

I found the cool dude, everyone!

I did my part!

Edit: upvoted to 196 then down once it hit 197.

I would love to see a huge robot that was shaped like the round headed Bic mascot.

You joke, but I have a cheap composition style notebook that I bought because it had a durable plastic cover instead of the old fashioned cardboard covered notebook I usually carry around. Each page has a qr code in the corner and it wants me to download an app so I can scan my writing and upload it to The Cloud.

I mean, I’m sure that someone might find that useful, but the whole reason I write with pen on paper is so I’m not distracted by technology and don’t have to worry about booting an app and having connectivity while constantly worried that my work may not be saved/disappear.

The plastic cover is nice, though.

It tastes like licking a crt screen that is showing the scrambled image of a grapefruit.

So, it’s great when the office stocks it for free.

Um, actually the proper name is Tromboner…

I’ve been praying for the black hole sun to come and wash away the rain for a few years now.

Also, ever eaten a shiny candy? Chances are is coated in confectioners glaze, which is a fancy word for shellac, which is an insect excretion.

I’ve witnessed this self defeating behavior in a number of LI sufferers.

I’m beginning to believe they enjoy the gastrointestinal distress as much as they enjoy eating cheese.

Wats ur Onlyfans?

Recently, it seems like standing your ground equals shooting through your door because there’s a non-white on the other side.