But they smell like up dog.

I feel this way about working out in the hotel parking lot. Maybe I’ll just workout in my room. Oh look, a TV and bed.

I have 2 demands for microwaves. Have a 30sec button and start when I press it once. After 1 minute of no use, just clear the time left. Also don’t beep every 10 seconds after the timer ends. I’m drunk and I probably don’t need that food if I don’t remember. That’s more than 2, so 30 demands and I’ll stop before I hit zero left.

Your funeral…

I used Planner in the past. Its integration with teams makes a webcam pointed at a white board a lot better.

Yep. That sounds like teams.

Oof, your silver bullet is fatal.

I talked to my coworker about this and he assured me that the current Teams was many years of polishing this turd. So it was way worse "back in the day*…

Why is teams so terrible? No really. It shouldn’t be this bad. I feel like ICQ, mIRC, and Roger wilco combo back in the day was better.

How does this effect me on /all? Will I notice?

I don’t want to live in this reality anymore.

I would get my flu shot if it came with a beer

The 2 guys that you immediately see when you say “why do all men suck?”

Where’s the straw?

Did that shrimp just fry the best rice ever? Oh and he didn’t flip an unwanted shrimp at me?

My fav is the Bun Alert System.

My wife always says I have a big cock. Probably because her’s is so small

We shall ride in 1 hr! Now where is my Scooty-Puff jr.