The longer you stare the more questions you ask yourself.

Well, hurtling toward the ground is what Peregrine falcons are good at.

And that’s why I’m not allowed anywhere near the back dock unattended.

The announcement happens after they’re already inside.

I quite like them, haven’t burnt myself when smoking a bong in a long time.

First week of 2024 and I had to put my dog of 15 years down, 2024 can fuck right off already, I’m done with it.

Yeah, it puts on a big show about it, I thought it was funny the first few times, but it became an asshole about it, standing up triggered it once.

My watch gave up on me and would patronize me when I walked to the fridge by saying “Congratulations” for just walking down the hall.

Yeah something definitely happened over the last week.

One of there ‘memes’ is about their gf telling them she had aids after hooking up, hopefully that’s a shit joke tho because that would suck for op.

That’s the best section to calm down in, there’s buttons you’re not only allowed to press but encouraged to mess with, there’s calming lights and you can put on a small light show.

Ok, how about Gnu ÷ Linux

Hey, at least it’s not the R Kelly trickle down economics.

Ahhh I see someone else found out what their cheese limit is. I haven’t shit properly since Christmas Eve.

🤙

Maybe you are drunk!

I’ll be right…

But he’s passed out in the back, so this teenagers gonna slap your burger together.

Wait till you do it when you’re on drugs!

I use.my machine that can do the work of 100 people to make shitty jokes online.

My theory is that cats domesticated us to serve them and once we were docile enough to be trusted they became lazy, but we got the last laugh, they didn’t predict our obsession with dressing them up in ridiculous but cute as fuck costumes just to make other humans go awww.